5 thinking patterns blocking your success
Limited Thinking
At some point in time, we ALL experience limited thinking. This is dangerous, because it keeps us stuck, we don’t allow any other possibilities, even "POSITIVE” possibilities to get in. We find a problem, for every solution, instead of a solution for every problem.
Our mind does not allow us to be solution focused or focus on how it can be done. By default we resort to what is not working, why it won’t work. We say things like “That’s just how I am” “It’s always been this way.” “I tried that before it didn’t work.”
Sometimes limited thinking is a result of our upbringing, what we learned and other times it is our experience. Find out if you experience limited thinking, by journal writing…asking yourself questions about your current “tolerations.”
Why are you clocking into a job week after week that makes you livid?
Why do you spend day after day in an environment that drains the life out of your soul?
Why are you breaking your back for a company that does not pay you your worth?
Why do you commit to unfair contracts or submit to exploitation?
These questions. are the points of pain for many professionals desiring to advance in their career, use their talents for their own business where they can be charged their worth.
So, what are the reasons, you are not looking for a better job or changing your career or doing something more fulfilling like starting your own business.
Why are you limiting yourself?
5 Disruptive Thoughts
Here is a short list of common cognitive distortions, from the book “Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy” by David Burns
Overgeneralization - You see a single negative event as a never-ending pattern of defeat
Emotional Reasoning - You assume that your negative emotions necessarily reflect the way things really are: "I feel it, therefore it must be true."
Disqualifying the Positive - You reject positive experiences by insisting they "don't count" for some reason or other. In this way you can maintain a negative belief that is contradicted by your everyday experiences.
Jumping to Conclusions - You make a negative interpretation even though there are no definite facts that convincingly support your conclusions.
Mind Reading: You arbitrarily conclude that someone is reacting negatively to you, and you don't bother to check this out.
The Fortune Teller Error: You anticipate that things will turn out badly, and you feel convinced that your prediction is an already established fact.
Should Statements - You try to motivate yourself with shoulds and shouldn'ts, as if you had to be whipped and punished before you could be expected to do anything. "Musts" and "oughts" are also offenders. The emotional consequence is guilt. When you direct should statements toward others, you feel anger, frustration, and resentment.
New Thinking Patterns
Whatever we “think” about a situation, will direct our emotions and behaviors, in reaction to the situation.
Every reaction has a consequence. So, if we think negatively and respond negatively the result is a negative emotion. Vice versa, think positive, respond positive and you will have a positive emotion. Just keep in mind: Think, Feel, Do.
How do you interrupt, disruptive thinking patterns, to think, feel and do better?
Challenge the thought
Change your inner dialogue
Reframe the picture
Example
Candace feels sad and defeated, when Angela got a promotion. Candace says to herself, “It’s because, she’s (Angela’s) smarter than me.”
Challenge - Is this a fact or opinion? What is the proof?
Change - Candace could think a new thought, “Angela’s hard work paid off.”
Reframe - Candace could say, “I am happy for Angela. I can get a promotion, if I complete my degree and took more initiative.”
Candace now feels inspired! When she had a mindshift and reframed the thought.
Do you see how in the example, when she put Angela’s promotion into a new perspective, she no longer feels sad or defeated? She now feels inspired that she can do the same, because she can also complete a college degree and she also could take more initiative.
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About The Author:
Seneca Williams, LMHC, CPC, therapist and coach, is the Founder of a premier membership network for women, to address entrepreneurship and emotional wellness. The Conquer Network was birthed, when she realized the distinct connection between an entrepreneurs success to her emotional wellness and mindset, which is not addressed in traditional business coaching. She helps women entrepreneurs, build confidence and improve their emotions, to improve their productivity as an entrepreneur. In the network, entrepreneurs gain strategies on personal growth and entrepreneurship from industry experts.